The Alternate Meaning Of Words

  • Coffee (n.), a person who is coughed upon.
  • Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained.
  • Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
  • Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk.Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent
  • Negligent (adj.), describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightie
  • Lymph (v.), to walk with a lisp.
  • Gargoyle (n.), an olive-flavored mouthwash.
  • Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline
  • Oyster (n.), a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddish expressions.
  • Frisbeetarianism (n.), The belief that, when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck there.
  • Pokemon (n), A Jamaican proctologist.
  • Flatulence (n.) the emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.